Wednesday, January 27, 2010

When a Man Loves a Woman

I must shout it from the roof tops, for it is something I can no longer keep to myself . . . . I have the best effing husband in the world. Now, I know that those of you lovely ladies who are married think I must be wrong, because you obviously have the best husband in the world, but I protest, for I have proof. This man, Jon, who has been my husband for 9.5 years and my companion for over 11, puts up with more bullshit than you will ever know. I'm moody, opinionated, and stubborn beyond belief. I'm hot-tempered, loud-mouthed, and regularly give Jon flack for not doing the things I've asked of him. If you read my prior blog, you will know that I do not keep up with the household chores as often as I should. Yet Jon, who is no doubt a saint, is still by my side. He does the dishes, gives the kids their baths, and today sent me 50 roses just because. He is also a man who is not jealous, and takes it as a personal compliment when someone praises my appearance and/or talents. He is so secure in our relationship in fact, that he made me a personal calendar of my favorite male celebrity for Christmas (some of you already know about my latest obsession with this famous man, but for those of you who don't, I will keep it to myself for now and write more about him another time). Jon is more than I ever dreamed for myself, and for that I am grateful.

To those of you who do not know, Jon and I met in college. He was friends with many of my friends, and a mere acquaintance for over a year before we began to form our own friendship. We spent much time together with our mutual friends around us and not much time alone. So when I suggested we all go see Meet Joe Black as a group and Jon was the only one who agreed to go, I felt guilty about seeing it alone with him w/o confessing that I was interested in much more than sheer friendship. I chalked up some courage and had that all too awkward discussion with him to which his response was, "Amber, I would love to go out with you." The next night we had our first date. We kept our original plans and indeed saw 'Meet Joe Black', however not far into the movie there came a point where I thought I might not go out with him again. It's hard for me to imagine the path my life would have taken if I had used only a single moment to make a truly poor decision that Jon might not be worth my time. Of all things I thought he was insensitive. Don't get me wrong, he has his moments, but I think back to all the wonderful heartfelt things he has done for me since we've been together and ponder how I earth I could ever have thought him to be unfeeling. So as the wife he has treated so dearly, I decided one of the ways to show him my appreciation was to write about how great he is and let others know how truly lucky I am.

Many of you must be wondering at this point (if you haven't already heard the story) what it on earth it was that Jon did that made me think for the briefest moment that perhaps he wasn't right for me after all. Let me first say that hindsight gives you a lot of perspective, as does age, and something this petty would not deter me from being in a relationship with someone today, and evidently I had enough foresight to know that I would one day look back on my thoughts and reflect on how stupid I really was in that moment. So for those of you who haven't seen Meet Joe Black and do not wish to be spoiled, read no further. For those of you have seen it, you know that close to the beginning of the movie Joe gets hit by a car, not once, but twice. On the second swipe Jon started to laugh hysterically and I was actually quite appalled that someone would think another person's death would be so humorous (and as Jon previews this he is laughing uncontrollably and insisting that if they just wanted to kill him without laughs, they only would have hit him with one car). I today can see the humor in the scene myself, but at the time I was too snobby to view things that way. Today I see things from the other side and know I am blessed that Jon continued to date me and stick with me through the thick and thin of it all.

So now I should be the wife that Jon deserves and stop typing this blog and go and do the things that make me a better wife, which may or may not include household chores. J

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